When it comes to relationships, there is one incredibly crucial factor that is all too often overlooked: consent. What is consent? Consent is an agreement between two people that must be given before each and every step of a sexual encounter. It’s essential, not just because it’s required by law in some countries, but more importantly because it ensures the pleasure and comfort of both parties involved.
While all consensual encounters are bound to be great, the ultimate sex session happens when enthusiastic consent is given and mutual trust exists within the relationship! With clear boundaries set and proper communication maintained, consenting adults can explore their desires and fantasies with confidence. Let’s take off our proverbial clothes and have a sexy adventure through the world of consensual lovemaking!
What is Consent got held up with so much Importance in a Relationship?
BDSM and kink play can involve activities that some might consider extreme or dangerous. Because of this, it’s absolutely essential that all parties involved are on the same page before any play begins. That’s where consent comes in. By ensuring that everyone involved has given explicit permission for a particular activity to take place, you can avoid any unwanted surprises or hurt feelings later on. This is crucial now because sexual consent is a necessary component for successful sexual activity.
1. Not Everyone wants to have Sex
This might seem like a no-brainer, but it’s worth repeating: not everyone wants to have sex. There are a whole host of reasons why someone might not want to have sex, and none of them are any less valid than the others.
Maybe they’re not in the mood. Maybe they’re not attracted to their partner. Or maybe they’re dealing with some personal trauma that’s made them lose interest in sex altogether. Whatever the reason, it’s not up to anyone else to decide whether or not someone else wants to have sex—that decision should always be left up to the person who is being asked.
2. People can Change their Minds at any Time
Even if someone says yes at first, they can change their mind at any point. This is often referred to as “consent intra rape”, and it’s an important concept to understand. Just because someone consents to one sexual act does not mean that they have consented to all sexual acts—and just because someone consents at first does not mean that they’ve consented forever.
If at any point during the sexual activity, someone changes their mind and says no, then the other person must stop immediately. Consent can be withdrawn at any time, for any reason, and it’s always respected by ethical practitioners of BDSM and kink alike.
3. Creates a Safe Environment
Consent also creates a safe space for everyone involved to explore their kinks and fetishes in a judgment-free environment. Knowing that everyone involved has agreed to the activity ahead of time means you can feel free to let go and fully enjoy yourself without worrying about crossing any boundaries.
How to Get Consent from Your Partner | Golden Rule of Consent
Knowing about the question in this context is not enough. It is important to follow it as well. Good consent practices are not only sexy but also necessary to make sure everyone involved is comfortable and safe. You will discover that the best way to get consent in sexual situations is to increase sex play and pleasure by incorporating tips. Here are some tips on how to get consent from your partner before you get kinky.
- Talk about it beforehand. Discussing what you both want to do beforehand can help make sure that you are both on the same page and that there are no surprises. Make sure to discuss any possible triggers or problems, so everyone knows what to expect.
- Use a safe word. A safe word is a word or phrase that either one of you can use to stop the scene if things get too intense. This is important because it gives you both a way to check in with each other. This makes sure that everyone is still enjoying themselves.
- Check-in frequently. This is the most important consent rule so far. Checking in with each other frequently during the scene can help make sure that everyone is still enjoying themselves and consensual. Take breaks as needed so that everyone can check in and ensure they’re still comfortable with what’s happening.
- Respect your partner’s limits. If your partner says “no” or asks you to stop, listen to them! Respecting your partner’s limits is an important part of consent and making sure that everyone involved is comfortable and safe.
Most Common Consent Challenges
Here are five of the most common challenges and how to overcome them.
1. One Partner may feel like they are always the One giving Consent
If one partner feels like they are always the one giving consent, they can start feeling resentful. After all, BDSM is all about both partners enjoying themselves. To overcome this challenge, try to take turns giving and receiving consent. This way, both partners will feel like they have an active role in the relationship.
2. One Partner may feel like they are not being given enough information
It is important to remember that BDSM is an activity that informed and willing participants should only undertake. If one partner feels like they are not being given enough information about what will happen during a scene, they may not be able to give informed consent. To overcome this challenge, make sure that both partners communicate openly with each other about their expectations and desires.
3. One Partner may feel Pressured into giving Consent
BDSM should be about fun and pleasure, not coercion or pressure. If one partner feels like they are being pressured into giving consent, it can spoil the entire experience for both partners. To overcome this challenge, make sure that both partners feel free to say “no” at any time during a scene. This way, both partners will know that the other is genuinely interested in what they are doing.
4. One Partner may feel like their Consent is being taken for Granted
When we enter into a BDSM relationship, we usually do so with the understanding that there is a certain power dynamic at play. However, just because one partner has consented to be submissive does not mean that their consent should be taken for granted. If one partner feels like their consent is being taken for granted, it can lead to feelings of resentment and even anger. To overcome this challenge, ensure that both partners respect each other’s limits and boundaries at all times.
5. One Partner may feel like they have no Control over the Situation
Even though BDSM relationships involve a power dynamic, both partners should still feel in control of the situation at all times. If one partner feels like they have no control over the situation, it can be very upsetting and even scary. To overcome this challenge, make sure that both partners agree on a safe word or phrase before beginning any kind of scene. This way, if either partner starts to feel uncomfortable or unsafe, they can use the safe word to stop immediately.”
My Last Thoughts
So there you have it – all about the question in discussion and other related aspects. Trust me, consent no consent is not so sexy. As someone who has been involved in the kink community for over a decade, I can tell you that enthusiastic consent is one of the most important things to remember. This means both parties are actively enjoying what’s happening.
If there’s any doubt or hesitation, stop and talk it out. It might sound like a lot of work, but having a healthy, safe, and satisfying sexual relationship is worth it. Have you ever experienced either type of consent? Tell me about it in the comments below!