I am a feminist. I believe in the social, political, and economic equality of all genders. And I also happen to enjoy submission in my personal life. Because feminism is about choice and equity, it can encompass both of these seemingly contradictory positions. For me, being a feminist and being a female submissive are not mutually exclusive; they are two aspects of my identity that exist harmoniously together. What matters most is that I am in control of my own choices and that those choices reflect my own values. But is this the same for all women?
At first glance, it would appear that the two concepts are mutually exclusive. After all, feminism is all about empowering women and demanding equality, while the submission is about giving up power and relinquishing control. Surely, these two things cannot coexist?
Wrong! It is perfectly possible to be a feminist and a submissive female. And, in many ways, the two concepts complement each other perfectly.
The very thinking about a woman being both a submissive female and feminist at the same time is not possible is an inherent patriarchal mindset. BDSM female sub is all about the expression of desire. Human beings are the end after all sexual beings. Why can’t we let women just want sex? For a female submissive BDSM, owning up to the facet can be extremely daunting. The very moral aspect that a woman is always placed in. Susan Sontag calls this making the female gender the “other” gender by the hetero male.
Breaking Free from Being the “Other” Gender
BDSM female submissive entails breaking free from the moral codes women are often confined in. The hetero-dominant mindset works in two manifolds here. There is the luscious aspect of the dominant aspect felt psychologically by the dominant concerning the submissive female.
At the same time, a BDSM female sub doesn’t go with the respected hierarchies of the societal order. Yes, much is dependent on the mindset of individuals. In the corporatization of power, dominants are seen more as the utopia of the strong. The submissive is the weak female verse. The object-oriented “other” creature is dependent on the hetero male.
The banning of abortion and other pushes towards customs of older days. This has also triggered subcultures like BDSM now a hush-under-the-table affair. The BDSM female sub is a byproduct of that wretched insanity we know as BDSM.
It is surprising though as philosopher Foucault mentions, that though the global right might be allergic to the notion of sex. Sex is all that we have talked about; since the times of churches and temples in ruling power by the controlling saints and priests. Yet the sight of a BDSM female submissive haunts us and screeches our morality. There is something so beautiful in knowing you are a female submissive and you like sex a certain way.
Being Female Submissive is an Expression of Equality
A submissive female is the biological desire of that person. They derive pleasure from being a BDSM female sub. These desires are the same as kissing on erogenous zones providing pleasure. They are an ardent representation of equality. Sexual intercourse becomes degrees better when both partners, be it a submissive female or dominant are in knowledge of their sexuality and the owning of their desires.
Equality in the Bedroom
For many women, submitting to their partner’s sexual demands can be incredibly empowering. After all, what could be more feminist than taking control of your sexuality and deciding what gives you pleasure?
In a society that still views sex as taboo and has difficulty talking openly about female sexuality, being a submissive female can be a way to take back power and reclaim your sexuality on your terms. After all, as the saying goes, “sex is power.” And what could be more feminist than that?
Also Read: I’m Falling in Love With my Submissive. What Should I Do?
A Balance of Power
In any relationship, there needs to be a balance of power. Otherwise, things can quickly become one-sided and unhealthy. A feminist submissive understands this balance and uses her submission to create a healthy dynamic in which both partners feel comfortable and respected.
For example, she may submit to her partner’s demands in the bedroom but make it clear that she expects him to do the same outside of the bedroom. She may let him take the lead when it comes to sex but assert herself when it comes to decisions about other aspects of their relationship. In this way, submission can lead to a more equal partnership overall.
A relationship involving a female submissive BDSM often involves a lot of communication. The submissive female expresses their desire and the extent they want to engage in being a BDSM female sub. The same holds for the other partner.
BDSM female sub is seen as a mythological figure almost in the mainstream hetero community. This is likely because of several old customs and prejudices, female submissive BDSM is getting a push behind into the oblivion of oppression.
Dance to Your Desire If You’re A BDSM Female Sub Lover
I am a feminist because I want to see all people, regardless of gender identity, have the same opportunities in life. And I am a female submissive because that’s what makes me happy. You don’t have to pick one or the other – you can be both. And you can equally love submission and domination games in bed as per your mood. Feminism and submission are not mutually exclusive; in fact, they can complement each other quite nicely.
Honestly, feminism is about giving women choices, and choosing to be a submissive does not negate any of the hard work that feminists have done over the years. Female submission can empower women by giving them control over their own sexuality and bodies. There are many different ways to be a feminist and a submissive, and it is important to remember that these labels do not define us. We should all strive to be inclusive and understanding of everyone’s individual experiences. What do you think? Are feminism and submission compatible ideologies?